I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize