he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
