I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
my nose is crying tears of wow.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
