At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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