you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
