Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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