And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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