So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
