So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
