yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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