No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
