I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
