I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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