i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know