I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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