Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Randomize
