Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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