glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
