Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
