Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
