i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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