it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
