Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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