About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
