he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize