listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize