Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
