I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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