I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
