going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
