Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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