Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize