My room smells like vodka and shame
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
