just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
