you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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