What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
