yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
