We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
