There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she smelled like a LAN party
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
