i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize