i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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