i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
