He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
