Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
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btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
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It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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