I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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