His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
