I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
