he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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