in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
