I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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