i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
two words...techno handjob
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
