Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
